Sunday, April 14, 2013

Farmer Quote #19: "If I find a casket, I'm burying it in here."


When you buy a house, especially a Jungle House, there are all sorts of mysteries you discover. One of our mysteries was right next to our back porch, in plain sight. And yet we hadn't "discovered" it until yesterday.

Oh, we knew it was there. We poked it with our feet periodically.

We talked about what it might be.

But we didn't dare try to open it for fear of what we might find.



Yeah...you wouldn't have touched it either, I know. It's kinda scary.

Now, for practical purposes, we didn't touch it when the inspector was at the house because we didn't want to have him declare we had to do something about it. I realize this seems backwards, but it was clear it wasn't anything that was currently in use with the house. We *did* miss it even seeing it at first, as it was covered up with brush and weeds and grass. Clearly it was not in use.

But the terms of our home renovation loan stated that we had to have all projects completed within six months for final monetary disbursement. We could start a new project the minute the inspector hit the end of the driveway, but not before. The federal government wanted to be sure we finished what we started.

So...no opening the mine shaft.

The secret passageway to China.

The treasure box of hidden gold.

Or...in this case...the drywell.



And before The Farmer took the top layer of rotten wood off the top of the hole he made the statement of the day:

"If I find a casket, I'm burying it in here."

Thank goodness we didn't find that! I really didn't want to start a unmarked cemetery in my backyard. I mean, we have a deck to build! I don't want the burial site right next to my new bar-be-que! It would ruin the mood of the outdoor parties. 

Plus, it might be a bit illegal.



The Farmer dug out the rotten boards and made sure the hole was cleaned out.





Then he added sand back into the hole. We have a lot of it in our front yard from fixing our septic tank that floated into the middle of our yard this fall.

Oh, I didn't tell you about that, did I?

Yeah...we got pictures. It's not pretty.

But this...*this* is pretty!


OK, it's all in the eyes of the beholder, but when you are renovating, this looks good.

Real good.

But I'm just glad we didn't have to perform a funeral for any uncovered caskets that might have been hiding in the mysterious hole in the backyard.

It would have put a total damper on the afternoon.






Wednesday, April 10, 2013

It's The Little Things...


...that are IN THE WAY!


I realize this photo just looks like a blue wall of siding in desperate need of a paint job.

True, it needs a paint job...*

But this is an important photo. 

Key evidence.

A sign of something important.

The true test that The Farmer loves me.


Those spackle holes? They are all that remains of my nemesis.




The ill-placed hose holder...


...has been removed. 


*Paint job completed.


Monday, April 8, 2013

The House of Seven Doors


The Farmer likes to prank. Just ask his college buddies.

Fortunately for me, he translates "pranking the Brunette" as "surprising the Brunette". Because, well, I have a hard enough time with surprises, let alone pranks. I like things all nice and neat and planned.

On the flip side, The Farmer didn't make any hotel reservations for our Honeymoon Road Trip.



So last month when I was away for three weeks for work, I knew the Farmer was surprising me with a few projects around the house.

Reason #1: We have a lot of projects to get done.

Reason #2: Before I left I asked him if we wanted to make a list (I like those too) of things to get done while I was away. His response? "I already have my 'Farmer's Project' list."

So I left him the camera with a sticky note to take photos of the Farmer's Projects.



I came home to seven - yes, seven - new doors! (OK, a few are framed in doorways that are still missing the actual door, but they still count.)


Door #1: The Back Door

Here is the original door. Lovely, isn't it? The screen door also doesn't stay open on it's finicky spring, so if you have things in your hands you have to use your hip to keep the screen door open while you fumble with the key to the back door


Here's the new door going in. And no, we are not putting back that screen door. 


And a stoop! Because you had to step up into the house before. Also notice what is behind Door #1 - my new dryer! Woo hoo! (More on the laundry room later...)


And why did The Farmer take this photo below? Because it shows the door actually fits! You couldn't see in the first photo but we had a 1/2 inch gap in the upper right corner between the door and the frame. It wasn't the most effective door.


Door number one! (Now ready for painting...)



Doors #2 & 3: The Patio French Doors

What you can't see from this "before" photo is that the handle to the slider is broken. It was a jagged mess that meant you used two fingers to open the door, less you scraped your hand. And you had to use your hip on this door too; it needed that much force to get it open. 


If we hadn't found a set of French doors that we could open "in" we would have had to have moved the pool table at this point - when the door was removed - as this is the only opening wide enough to move out the large table. Fortunately, we found a French door that opened the correct direction and allowed us to keep the left door stable/closed most of the time (because, well, there's that kitchen window in the way...). But when (not if) that pool table is ready to be moved, we have the big hole to move it!


Much better. 

I like this surprise already. Even without the trim.


Yep. We are painting around this door too. And we had to make sure not to paint my new doors blue, because they sure look pretty white. 



Door #4: The Changing Room Door

Doesn't everyone have a Changing Room? To explain, The Farmer doesn't bring his farm clothes into the house. They stay outside. Fortunately we have this huge shop space that we are converting into a Changing Room/Pool Room.


The door below (not one of the seven, in case you were wondering) leads out to the covered breezeway to the back patio (and New Door #1!), so The Farmer doesn't have to get rained on in between the Changing Room and the house.

It rains here in the Pacific Northwest.


So they marked out the new walls...



And put up the framing...


Of course, The Farmer forgot to take a photo of New Door #4, but you can kinda see it to the left of this opening looking into The Changing Room. And no, this is not a window (thankyouforasking); it's the space for the mirrored medicine cabinet. The Farmer wants his Changing Room fancy and blinged-out.


This smaller room will be easier to heat and we can lay carpet. 

Because the wet shoes and wet jackets are going to stay out in the Changing Room Entry, which is essentially the space where the carpet is located in the photo below.



Door #5: The Changing Room Entry into Pool Room

See! Changing Room on the left and CR Entry on the right! It will not have carpet because of all those wet clothes.

It rains here in the Pacific Northwest.



And Doors #6 & 7: Pool Room French Doors

And the amazing discovery in the shop? We had insulation! (Because there doesn't seem to be much insulation in other areas of the house.)


The back of the shop opening up...



And the final result...


(Thank you to my Uncle Bob and Aunt Lois for the doors. They removed them from their house and donated to the cause.)

So we're all ready for that pool table to move. OK, almost ready. We still need to finish the walls, add in a few lights and electrical outlets, paint the floors, and fix the hole in the ceiling before we can move in that table.

Perhaps I need to go away again so The Farmer can come up with a few more surprises...













Sunday, April 7, 2013

A Visit from Flat Arlen


Has Flat Stanley ever visited you?

Well, Flat Arlen visited us last week! Sent to us by our friend Arlen on the opposite side of the country, Flat Arlen arrived in a manila envelope to spend a few days with us on the farm.

I hope he had a good time!


It was blue skies and sun on the walk to the barnyard.


He helped load hay bales using the SkidSteer.


And he and Dr. J became fast friends when Flat Arlen fed him his afternoon bottles. (Wilt, in the next pen, was jealous...)


I hope the real Arlen comes to visit soon! (C, that's a not-so-subtle hint!)

Tuesday, April 2, 2013

Unexpected Background Noise...Of A Chainsaw


Living on a farm you hear all sorts of machinery noises. But when you hear a chainsaw in your backyard, you take notice. So this morning, as I wrote my upteenth email for the day, when I heard the high pitch din of the chainsaw I had to go investigate.

This is what I found...




Remember when The Farmer had ten minutes and cut down a tree in the front yard?

Yep. It has happened again.

The holly tree in our backyard has found its demise in the hands of an idle Farmer with a few minutes on his hands. Now, to be fair, we had been planning to cut down this tree. A year ago it was almost two stories tall. The Farmer "trimmed" it in half last spring but it didn't quite work. It still looked like this overgrown monstrosity. Alas, it had to go.

I just didn't know this meant before lunch.


Side Note: I particularly like this view.


So, poor holly tree, we bid you adieu.


Of course, now we have a monstrosity of a dog house in plain view.


Perhaps The Farmer can take the chainsaw to that tomorrow.

Or a match.

I know how to use those.